I'm the ugly friend
No. I wasn't the ring leader.
I was the one who sang off tune in the back ground.
The child chosen in the middle for dodgeball.
Pity laughter for the young child.
I was the one that learned I was okay.
I compared trials with you.
I dealt with self image my whole life, you said it didn't matter compared to your trials.
But, "Momma, they're pickin' on the fat kid again."
High school is only a puppet show.
The kids on top have the strings.
The "populars"
They control the show and make you feel like you are insignificant, only in the background.
Why is that the story?
Top dog, little dog, dead dog.
It's dumb, the life we have accepted.
Because I remember the mean kids being known as bullies, not popular.
I wasn't ashamed to be seen in public with you.
Even though the entire school was at the zoo.
Waiting to see who the elephant had a crush on.
I guess I stopped caring when I realized the difference between being someone, and mattering to someone.
It's funny how as you near the fork in the road you question yourself over and over which way you'll go.
You even regret some of the paths you took before.
Checklist:
-apologize for not being nicer to the girl who lived near the highway
-tell 2nd grade friend you heard her talking about 2nd grade, and you sure as heck were not an "imaginary friend"... Sorry I'm not cooler
-kiss the boy
-promise to be better
This marionette was tired of the tension, so I cut the strings.
"You put the killing thing right between your teeth, but you don't give it the power to do it's killing"
Mattering to someone was far more important.
I'm the one who realized I was okay.
I was the one who sang off tune in the back ground.
The child chosen in the middle for dodgeball.
Pity laughter for the young child.
I was the one that learned I was okay.
I compared trials with you.
I dealt with self image my whole life, you said it didn't matter compared to your trials.
But, "Momma, they're pickin' on the fat kid again."
High school is only a puppet show.
The kids on top have the strings.
The "populars"
They control the show and make you feel like you are insignificant, only in the background.
Why is that the story?
Top dog, little dog, dead dog.
It's dumb, the life we have accepted.
Because I remember the mean kids being known as bullies, not popular.
I wasn't ashamed to be seen in public with you.
Even though the entire school was at the zoo.
Waiting to see who the elephant had a crush on.
I guess I stopped caring when I realized the difference between being someone, and mattering to someone.
It's funny how as you near the fork in the road you question yourself over and over which way you'll go.
You even regret some of the paths you took before.
Checklist:
-apologize for not being nicer to the girl who lived near the highway
-tell 2nd grade friend you heard her talking about 2nd grade, and you sure as heck were not an "imaginary friend"... Sorry I'm not cooler
-kiss the boy
-promise to be better
This marionette was tired of the tension, so I cut the strings.
"You put the killing thing right between your teeth, but you don't give it the power to do it's killing"
Mattering to someone was far more important.
I'm the one who realized I was okay.
Oh. I love this. A lot.
ReplyDelete"I'm the one who realized I was ok"
"High school is only a puppet show."
ReplyDeleteand the line about dead dogs.
I LIKE THIS.
Mmmmm just the whole thing! I think I'm in love!!!
ReplyDeleteYes! I most definitely remember you! You're so sweet for remembering me and for reading my worn out writing:) Thank you in the most sincere way possible.
ReplyDeleteAlso: this is excellent. Loved the checklist. And this line, "Mattering to someone was far more important."
Yes yes yes. So very good.
Your writing may be worn out to you, but to me, it's new comfort!
DeleteBroke my heart, it was so beautiful. The checklist especially.
ReplyDelete